The Weekend!

Me dad is home! ME mum left Saturday afternoon and when she came back, she brought me dad home! Nows I have me two people back to play with me!

And then on Sunday, me parents went to some big party about it being July 4th, must be an American fing.. and they broughts me back a puppy! He's this wonderful little stuffed chap who I can beat up and bite and run around with in me mouth! He's marvelous!

I love me American parents!

Payback...

So's I'm slowly getting payback against Mum for me surgery...

What she didn't know 'til today was I've been whizzing in her luggage she left open on the floor.
Extra points for me self were scored due to the fact that she still had clothes in it! She spent a good 15 or 20 just trying to scrub the thing!

Serves her right for choppin' off me parts and stuffin' papery stuff in me litter box. At least now she's put some stuff worth diggin' in in it!

Back to Me Usual Self

Well I'm back to me usual self... almost

I'm still sleepin' a lot but I'm back to sneak attackin' Mum when I pretends to be all sweet and cute.

She gets mad every time I try to bathe what's left o' me pride. She even went so far as to put a cone 'round me neck. I sure showed her though. I was knockin' into all sorts of stuff keepin' her awakes. And then I was smart enough to get it off all by me self!

The only problem is that she put this funny shredded stuff in me litter box. She took out the stuff that's fun to dig in and kick all 'round the bath and put in shredded papery bits and even I fink the bath smells funny now.

Time to 'cause more trouble!

The Hangover

Mum went and did it! She dragged me to the vet early this morning and before I knows it, me precious gems are gone! The blasted woman had me neutered! As If it's not enough to keep me cooped inside away from all the fun stuff, she goes and does this! Bah... And now I feels like I spent all night at the pub. I'm stumblin' round the house. I keep passin' out and wakin' up in different places- first the carrier, then the kitchen, then next to the table, then the front door mat... And to add insult to me injury, I peed me self whiles I was still sleepin' in me carrier. And if I start to clean me self back there, Doc told mum to stick this bloody plastic cone on me neck... When is Dad going to come home and rescue me??

So there's good things and not so good things bout me mum bein home.

Good Things:
1- I love me mum so I'm always happy to see her
2- She gives me milk to drink
3- She brought home a fantastic leather string for me and I run round the house carryin' it in me mouth

Not So Good Things:
1- She doesn't fancy getting outta bed at 5am so she shuts me in me travel carrier when I tries to get her up to play!
2- Unlike me dad, she does not let me outside at all
3- She doesn't fight with me like me dad does so's every time I try to, I gets bopped on the head

I wonder when me dad is comin' home...

The Front Door!

Me mum will be so proud of me when she returns! I have taught me self how to open the front door!

I tried to show me dad but he had fallen asleep on me couch while watching the picture box. And then when I opens it, the wind goes all crazies and blows it open to bits! I jump on me dad cause I was scared and accidentally scared him back and he frew me across the room! Oops, Sorry Dad!

I still can't to show Mum :)

Revenge...

So I'm not too happy with me dad for two reasons:

1- He says I'm smelly and sprayed me with this awful Febreeze stuff.

2- He dragged me to this awful place where they took me temperature in me bum and then stuck me with sharp things- aka The Vet

A Tomcat's Revenge???

I pooped in me dad's backseat on the way home because the chap didn't put me in me travel carrier :)

Mum sent me gifts!

So me mum sent me dad and me gifts by post from the states!

Dad got this little metal flat box thing that makes noise- an iPod?

But me own gifts from mum are much better! She sent a fabulous brush for dad to brush me down every night and every morning. She also sent this little plastic fing that sweeps up cat hair off the furniture and off of ME! Though I don't s'pose it was intended to sweep me, it's like a lovely massage. So now me dad is trained to brush me down and sweep me down every morning and every evening when I jumps in his lap. I let Mum see how much I love 'em when she talks to dad in the box every night. (Dad calls it "Skype". I guess its anoffer one of those silly American fings.)

I talks to me mum on this Skype too! I see her in the box and I meow and squeak at her and she talks right back! I tell her how dad wouldn't let me out to play with the girl cat who lives next door and how he doesn't give me milk every mornin' like she does. And I tell her I miss and she needs to come home to play with me. I do get lonely all day by me self when dad's at work.

He's Home!

So I was sittin round me house all by me self this week except for the lady who acme by to makes sure I had food. I got into lotsa mischief without me mum there to say "No!" I knocked over all the soap bottles into the bath and wrestled with the bath rugs. I rolled all over me mum and dad's bed, making it nice and hairy which I know me dad loves! And I knocked over me mum's picture frames downstairs. Serves her right for leavin' me all alone!

But now me dad is back and boy am I happy to see him! I let him pet me and brush me and sat with him while he talked to mum on the computer. I still haven't figure out how me mum got into that little box... I was still happy to see me dad and wanted to play but he kept tryin to sleep so I'd jump on his head to wake him up or stomp all over him. That's what he gets for sleepin' on me couch.

I'm so happy to see me dad :)

Nibble Nibble.... CHOMP

Today, I'm pretending me mum's arm is an ear of corn.

I grab it with both me paws, and nibble up and down until I get a really good spot and then...

chomp chomp chomp CHOMPCHOMPCHOMP CHOMPPPPPPPP

How to Make Mum Mad

I have a favorite new way to make me mum (and dad) mad.

I like to knock over glasses filled with water!

First I check to see if there's anyfing in the glass. Then I dips me paw in it. And then... WHAM! I knock it with me paw and watch the water spill out and soak everything around it.

It's such fun that I did it twice last night! First I did it on the dining table and then I did it on the end table! I hope Mum leaves her water glass for me to knock over some more tonight!

Almost Free!

So's yesterday morning, after making breakfast, me dad left the kitchen window titled open. (For you Americans, the windows open differently: you can swing them open kinda like a door, or for those with sneaky little Toms like me self, you can tilt it in so's its open about 4 to 5 inches at the top.) And I sees me opportunity to escape! I jump on the kitchen counter, knockin' a few fings outta me way. And then....I spring!

mmmmrrrrrrrrrOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW! That hurt!

I underestimated me jump and got lodged between the window and the frame with me back-end still inside and me front half danglin' out the dinow! I just yowled and me mum and dad came runnin' to free me. I was so ashamed- my one easy shot and I missed it! Mum lifted me up and cuddled and cooed at me, trying to sooth me poor achin' ribs though it was me pride she shoulda been soothin'. Of course, me dad shuts the window then and all hopes of escape were dashed.

One of these days, I'll get out..

New Photos

Snoozin' Spots

So being a cat and lovin' to catnap, I thought I'd list my favorite snoozin' spots.

1. Current top spot: smack dab in the middle of mum's dining table

2. Middle of the living room floor

3. Bathroom Sink 'cause I fit perfectly

4. Dad's Feet (when he's in bed of course)

5. Top of the stairs so's I can watch for opportunities to dash out the front door!

6. Bath mat while me mum takes a shower-
Can't let her sneak by me! or in case she needs to be rescued!

7. Me mum and dad's bed when they leave it open and no one is around

They Covered Me Window!

So me present aka the new couch was pretty awesome until they went and covered me big window! They put up these long, horrible dangly bits of fabric- mum calls them curtains. But now's I can't watch every thing in me front yard!

First they won't lemme outside. Second, they start givin' me baths. And now they've covered me window! What are they gonna do next? Neuter me?!

Well, at least Mum has giving me a peep hole.

Grumble grumble...

So Mum put a pink bow on me neck this mornin'.

It's 9:16pm and the bloody bow is still there.

I'm not on speaking terms with Mum 'til she removes it...

Blasted Mouse

So I walks by the table that the computer/telly is on; mum and dad use the telly as a computer screen. And this little white fing catches me eye. It's dartin here and there and everywhere across the screen, and I'm finking, "Man, that bloody thing must be drivin' Mum nuts!" So I jumps up on the table with every intention of catchin' the little bugga. But I can't! The little fing is too quick! Every single time I go to knock it with paw, it just slips away and goes movin' off in another direction! I tried and tried but had to give up. It's just impossible to catch that blasted li'l fing.

Sorry, Mum. I tried to help.

Catnapping

Catnapping is one o' me all time faves.

No, not burgling a place and sneakin off with the resident cat...

I fink if I had to be a professional of somefing, it would be catnapping

I can sleep just about anywhere, anytime... or maybe that's a male fing 'cause me mum says me dad does the same fing...

I can sleeps on the dinner table, in a chair, on the floor, on the couch, in the bathtub or the sink, on the bed or under the bed, in me travel carrier. Me mum also likes to laugh at me when I sleep in funny poses like all curled up with me head upside down or on me back with all me paws open and me belly exposed for ticklin... grrr I hate when she walks by and sticks me in the belly with her toes.. but I always get me revenge on them wiggly bit when she falls asleep at night muahahahaa.. ahem, I mean, I'm a sweet li'l Tom who never holds a grudge.

More catnapping shall ensue

A Present Just For Moi!

So's about 9am this mornin, there's a knock on me front door. Two blokes in a truck have arrived with a GINORMOUS package. It was big and blue and covered in this fantastic plastic bubble stuff! I thought that was great on its own- I coulda had fun all day with it.

But then mum unwraps it and VOILA! I have me own big red comfy couch! It's so cushy and comfy and it came with some lovely pillows, too. I can just leans me self up against the arm rest and let me front paws dangle a bit over the edge. Or I can curl up in a little ball on the middle cushion or stretch out and take up the whole thing! I can even sit on the armrest or the back of the couch and look at the window. No straining me neck or standin on me hind paws no more! I can just lay all lazy on the couch and observe me yard and chirp at the birdies who dare to land on me lawn!

But the best part of having me own couch- I can share it with mum and then curl up right next to her and have 'Mummy and George Time'. She gives me the bestest presents, me mum does.

I'm a Scaredy Cat

2nd Post in One Day! I'm feelin ambitious...

So's I'm a completely scaredy cat in two ways.

#1 - The Vacuum
Mum decided to vacuum upstairs and the stairs themselves. Of course as soon as she turns the bloody thing on, I freaked out! I'm pretty sure this giant black vrooming monster will suck me right up and I will be George no more. So's I run down the stairs, fru the livin' room and hide behind the wash machine until mum comes and rescues me... pathetic, I know.

#2- Outside
So's I been writing bout me escapades where I sneaks past mum or dad and bolt out the door, right? Well... mum decided it was a beautiful day and that I should go outside. I says to meself, "George, what's the catch?" It was a cat leash ! So's she puts it on and it feels all weird and of course, I don't budge. I'm a respectable Tom, I says, and won't do it! Well, she opens the backdoor and the fresh air gets the better of me. I steps onto the patio and starts sniffin away. But then I sees one of the dreaded giant pigeons land in a nearby tree and I hopes it doesn't carry me away and then some strange human comes runnin through the backyard on the pavement and the wind starts blowing hard and ITS JUST TOO MUCH FOR ME! I scrambled at the door and mum reads me mind and opens it to let me back in the house. It was just too scary- just couldn't handle it all.

So there- I am an official scaredy cat and will remain a house cat. I will have to content myself to sleepin all day and runnin through the house when I feels of bit o' wildness come over me.



PS for you American folks, pavement = sidewalk