Bath Problem Solved!

The past few nights I've decided to give me mum and dad a break and not pester them all night. What brought this on? See the previous post involving a certain black cat, a bottle of kitty shampoo, and lots and lots of water....

The event that brought on said bath was that during one of my midnight escapades in the water closet, mum gave me a rub down and mumbled something along the lines of "ilgh, george, you smell like cat... stinky, male cat" and I finks, "Well, wot do you expect?" Then the next evening, I get aforementioned bath.

So being the intelligent feline that I am, I decided that if I don't wake her up, and she doesn't rub me down, and she doesn't sniff her paws and declare I smell like "stinky, male cat" then I can avoid all future baths! See? I'm brilliant! Genius, in fact.

How to avoid baths: Solved.
How to open the front door: Solution still in progress.

Oh the shame!

I's just mindin me own business, watchin the faucet drip, waitin for dad to get done in the bath so's he can play with me s'more... then when I wasn't looking-

They scooped me up and plunked me in the tub and SOAKED me from tail to toe, while holdin me down against me will! Doesn't a cat get a say in any of this?? I says to me self.

Then they soaped me, TWICE, scrubbin me all over, including me unmentionables...

And then soaked me again! At this point I'm sure I looks like a drowned rat and they've been laughing at me own expense this whole time. So's I've given up by now cause I'm no match for dad and the waters pretty warm so at least I'm not freezin me parts off.

And as mum scoops me up in a towel, I watch the last bit of me dignity wash down the drain with the soap suds..

I can't imagine me evenin gettin any worse. Now I must bathe me self proper... and plot up some plan to get me revenge tonight when they goes to sleep...

Favorite Place #1

I thought I would post some photos of me in one of me favorite places in me new house.

 

  

 Just after these two, I accidentally stuck me head under the water!

  

I love to play in here when mum and dad go to bed.

I was hopin mum'd turn the water back on

George to the Rescue!

So I've made up me mind that humans are bonkers. How I arrived at this:

So I's mindin me own business and I hear running water. 'Oh no' I says to me self. I run up the stairs and find me mum getting into the bath and INTO THE WATER! Any self respectin cat in his right mind would never do a fing like that. I meow, "Mum! What are you doing?!" And put me paws on the edge of the bath. And all she does is start making human sounds at me. Oh why doesn't she speak cat already?! I've been here 6 days- she should be fluent by now!

So's I keep meowing that I want to help her and she just keep standing in the water. I jump on to the tub and try to talk her out but she does nuffink. I pace between the bath curtains, worrying me self silly. What was she finkin gettin in the water? I peeks around the curtain by the sink and gets me face all wet and jump away into the sink and back to the floor. (Mind you, I'm still yellin at her the whole time, lecturin her on the dangers of water, especially runnin water.) I jump back on to the back of the tub to try and coax her out. But she's got her head under the water so nows I have to take drastic measures. I slide down into the tub, meowing my displeasure the entire way. So now I'm on the verge of bein in the water me self, still meowing "Why are you still in the water? Have you heard a single bloody thing I've said?!" And that's when the water got me! I scrambled back outta the tub and try to dry me self off. By now, I'm ready to call it quits but I give it one more go and jump up and sit me self between the curtains again. I try boppin her frew the curtain but she just pokes back at me. I bop her again, and again she pokes back.

So's I says to me self- "That's it. I'm frowin in the towel. I've tried me best but she don't wanna listen." And I sits me self on the loo and wait to see if she ever comes out again alive... (I's really hopin she would or I'd have no one to feed me or pet me or dangle me favorite fishin pole)

And that is why human are bonkers. Standing for hours and hours under runnin water, never having a care for a cat's worryin.

PS- Mum made it out alright, jus in case you were worried too.

Cats need Freedom too

I'm jus frowin dis out there- Cats need freedom too.

I mean, I jus want to enjoy the garden and the grass and the sky and the flowers and the trees... and kick the stuffin' outta other toms who come into me garden...

But no. Me parents stack up boxes so's I can looks out the window and watch the bloke tramp all over me lovely grass (though its covered with some white stuff at the moment). So I'm jumpin at the front door trying to tell the bugga to sod off and dad comes after me likes he gonna get me and I runs up the stairs. Of course dad gets to go out and rough 'em up a bit but I'm stuck in the house. And me mum's keeping the stairs so's I can't get by and dart out the front door when dad opens it again.



I just want to be free to claim me own bushes. Is that too much to ask?

What was my crime?!

So I spent the night in me travel cage.  And for the love of me, I don't know exactly why..

I was just minding me own business, investigating everything in the loo, knocking things off the counter and the windowsill, just to get a better look and make sure they were a-ok for me mum and dad to use. And mum comes in, plucks me up, tosses me into the hall,  and puts everything back where I can't get a looksie. This means she wants to play right?? So when she crawled back in bed, I made up my mind I would give up my investigation and play with her. So I ran unduh the bed and attacked her paw that was hanging off the side.  She starts saying my name and some strange sounds like "no" and "stop".  So I keeps playing peekaboo in the dust ruffle and what'd'ya know? She chucks me back in the hall and closes the door! Cheeky, isn't she? 

So I goes back to me original investigation and focus on the hard scrubby thing on a string on the soap holder in the bath. Of course it's no good me standing on me back legs all night, so I knocks it off.  'Tsme duty to make sure everything alright. So I knocked it around a li'l to show him 'oos boss and mum comes back in and grabs me again! At least this time she didn't lock me outta her room.

But I remembers I saw a dodgy hair band and some pins on the sink so I go back to check the li'l buggas out.  I knocks em into the sink ( I mighta knocked into some stuff on the back of the loo gettin' to 'em) and I give the ol' 1,2 and mum comes in again, turns on the light over the sink, says my name and a few other words which di'n't sound too cheerful and out I went back in the hall! I watched her go back to bed, but I wasn't convinced of those pins yet. So I jumps back onto the sink and they're gone! I was right! So I jumps and grab the pull cord and the light comes back on and I land in the bath! Prrrrfect! Now I'm thinkin I can really get down to business. But I hear someone moving in the bedroom... and dad walks in. He chucks me in the hall and turns off the light and goes back to bed. At least it wasn't mum..

But I thought I would give those bottles on the window sill one last look over, and the scrubby thing while I'm at it so I jump back up, and start telling those bottle 'oos runnin the show, shovin' em around a bit, knocks a few off to really interrogate 'em and mum comes back in AGAIN! I'm finkin' my investigation isn't goin no where fast when she picks me up, carries me into her room, and puts me in me travel cage and then LOCKS THE DOOR! So I try to pick it with me claws but it just doesn't work! 

What have I done to deserve being shut up in me travel cage? I's just trying to make sure all the scrubby and smell good things are safe for me new parents. You know, they do good by me, takin me in and all, and I do good by them, and investigate their bath stuffs.

Someone please tell me, what was my crime?!

Let me introduce me self proper

They call me George, well, that is, me new mum and dad do. See, I've had two other mums and dads but, for some reason or another, they couldn't keep me. But these two new folks seem rather keen on keeping me, or at least that's what they say. But now back to me! I have big green eyes and am a bit leggy. I have a beautiful, long tale that I love to swish around a bit. And me fur is like black velvet. Did I mention I was a cat?

I am around 5 months old and was born and raised in England. I used to live in Mildenhall but now, I live in Brandon, just outside RAF Lakenheath. My parents talk funny, being from America and all. They said I will get to go back with them when my dad's done working over here. He's in the US Air Force. Me mum comes and goes all day, sometimes with bags o' goodies for me. I'm rather fond of her already. She plays with me all day and lets me snooze in her lap while she eats or drinks her tea. But I'm fond of me new dad too. He plays with me when he gets off a' work and lets me wrestle with him. In the morning when he gets ready for work, I help him shave and brush his teeth and tie his shoes. I'd like to go to work with him but he won't let me out the front door! So instead, I go and cuddle with me mum until she decides its time to get up. There I go, ramblin bout me parents again- more about me:

Things I like: me fishing pole with the green fish; chicken (thanks mum!); napping on mum's dining room chairs; runnin mad circles under mum and dad's bed in the wee hours of the mornin; chasin anything that moves like mum's feet on the stair, dad's feet under the covers, hair bands, paper towel rolls, the ceiling fan..
Things I don't like: when I catch the green fish and try to run, the li'l bugger pops out a' me mouth and goes back to mum or dad (i still can't figure that one out), when mum and dad move me from the middle of the bed to the floor...; bein woken up from me nap, being alone in a room (I meow til I find mum or dad); when the washing machine changes cycles..

MRRRRR-yawn.... I do believe its nap time.

Until next time!